As MS progresses, it can definitely bring out the dark thoughts. The gloomy outlook, hard to find a purpose, we all know the drill. As things get worse it is unavoidable to not have these thoughts. As I try and think about "how in the hell am I going to keep my chin up as my health goes down?", I am really wanting to try someting. I want to try and throw one thing out every day, or most days anyway, that put a smile on my face. I'm not in despair, and I don't want to be. I'm catching glimpses, and am so scared of it that I want to try drastically different things to find hope and purpose than I have ever tried before. I know this is very "Oprah", but hey, love her or hate her, she tries like hell to figure out ways for people to love life and appreciate things. Regardless, I'm starting this thread to try and bring one uplifting thing about my life to the top every day, even if it's only for the period of time it took to write it, so here goes:
My knees hurt like hell today and I'm very upset about that because it's keeping me from walking much.
However, I'm so very thankful that my adolescent daughter really appears to be "taking the high road" and is really turning out to be a very likeable individual. For that, I am thankful today. How our kids turn out, I feel, is a huge reflection of how they were raised, and I'm feeling pretty good about the job we've done so far. Being a teenager, I know that could change by tomorrow
, but I'm thankful for that today and will try to draw positive energy from that if I start to have a pity party for myself today.
Damn that felt good and, at least for now, I feel good about the prospects of having a good day; not a bad one!