Hey Julie, my name is Matt, I am 20 years old and was just diagnosed about a month or two ago ( losing track of time, I can't tell if it's been days weeks or months anymore). anyways, I feel for you because right now I'm getting much better with the exception of my eyesight, going through the same exact thing as you. In fact I can barely read what I'm writing right now, and that's with glasses...
Of all my symptoms my eyesight has been the most frustrating, it's hard to be happy about any other change of symptoms because it seems like my eyesight just gets in the way... everything is blurry and though my glasses helped that first my vision keeps tweaking so my prescription is no longer perfect... the other day I even started getting headaches again.
I'm a firm believer that your mental health/ attitude directly affects your physical body and healing process and so, I've done everything in my power to maintain my attitude and not fall into a pit of depression. My advice to you, would be find something you enjoy and focus on it. I enjoy writing, something I couldn't do at first because my vision was so bad, but the reason we as human beings still live upon this planet is because we naturally have the ability to adapt and overcome.
So, I really can't read and I have no fine motor control in my left hand, how the hell am I supposed to write? I adapted. To read I copy and paste everything to a new Word document and make the letters huge and in addition I use my computer's narrator software to read out loud as I read in my head, it kind of helps. To write, I got some voice recognition software so that I don't need my left hand to type. So now I have accommodated my handicap.
Now that I can continue writing, I started a blog which you will find in my signature, this blog has become the focus of my life, I work on it all-day because I enjoy writing and blogging gives me something to focus on. If I did not have this hobby I would lose my mind because I'm not one to enjoy laying around listening to TV especially since watching is not the most enjoyable thing with my eyesight right now...
I have also always talked about writing a novel and now I have the perfect opportunity to do so. Maybe I'm not in the best physical condition for writing but honestly I'm writing more this handicap than I was before because I've turned my life focus to this hobby, it keeps me positive, keeps me busy, and makes time fly! Not to mention it's keeping me in touch with other people which greatly helps my attitude.
I know not everyone likes to write but I really do feel that journaling is the best thing you can do with MS whether it's a personal journal or a blog to share with others. It helps to look back at the progress you've made, your ups and downs, etc. because then you can look back and compare where you are now to where you were then, so even if you're walking is not 100%, you can look back and read about when you were stuck in a wheelchair and that makes you appreciate whatever walking you can do at the moment, you know?
That's all just my opinion, everyone is different though. Sometimes you just need to vent because no matter what you have in your life, your still going to have your ups and downs. I'm not very religious but I can honestly say I know how you feel, sometimes I just look up at the sky and ask " what are you bored up their?'... and that's why we vent, feels good and sometimes that's all you can do just don't dwell, don't get yourself stuck in a ditch, just remember it's just one of those days and it will pass.
As I tell everyone here feel free to message me if you just need a stranger to talk to, you can also check out my blog where you will find my e-mail and a link to my facebook. best of wishes,-Matt
(sorry for any spelling/grammar issues lol)