This Is MS Multiple Sclerosis Community: Knowledge & Support

Please tell me I'm not crazy--or at least not alone

I woke up this morning and my right calf hurt like I had a pulled muscle. I have been working out regularly and figured that I just overdid it yesterday. But in the back of my mind I was probably wondering if it was the start of a relapse since my right leg is always affected. About an hour after I got to work I swore my right foot had gone partially numb right in the arch. So, I took my shoe off and rubbed my foot about a thousand times and walked back and forth on it to see if it felt different. It really didn't so I just left it alone but now the thought was definitely in my mind.

Then I swore that my shirt felt diffently against the left side of my ribs. I again felt my skin there about a thousand times and tested it with hot and cold to see if my sensation was dulled. Again, I couldn't really tell. It wasn't an obvious difference.

I preceded to spend most of the rest of the day poking different parts of my body, testing my eyes, testing my writing and walking to make sure my gait wasn't getting worse. Nothing came of any of this. I felt ok and the numbness I thought I felt was gone within an hour. About the only thing I accomplished was giving myself a headache. Thank God I have a cubicle so none of my co-workers could see me. They probably would've thought I lost it.

Has anyone else ever freaked out like this for no apparent reason?

Rest assured. You're not alone nor crazy.
I sometimes run, what I call, a "balance test" on myself.

I pick a visual spot (eye level) a few yards away and walk towards it. If I can touch the spot with my finger without a problem, I feel better.

My first MS symptom was vertigo. One day, while taking a walk outside, I discovered that I couldn't walk a straight line.

Cheers,

Niko

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"Avoid making irrevocable decisions when tired or hungry." -- Robert Heinlein

on every relapse i freak myself out that I am not recovering, and have switched over to SP or PP.

I do this all the damn time. It's the one part of this disease that I hate. The constant major self awareness. I have days like that often. My newest one has been incidents of incontinence (bladder, an luckily at bedtime and not at work) and after that happens the first time you really screw with yourself. I'm just taking a giant chill pill until I get done with this Tovaxin trial.

I get like Cure also. I wonder if this is the start of a straight downward plunge. Hang in there.

I am doing this right now because after a course of IV steroids and then prednisone taper my eyesight issues are still not "right". I, too, have been having the "what if" thoughts running through my head. It is comforting to know I am not alone in that, at least. This disease is sooo frustrating, to say the least!!
Lori

Progression is the hardest thing, i have said this before but you just deal with one thing and another is just around the corner. For most of us we will get worse for the rest of our lives and that can be hard to take. What you are feeling Loryias is so normal just get through it. I am always afraid of being negative for you all but depending on how you feel it's hard not to be..

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Had ms for over 19 years now.

no alone..there are times i am walking up and down stairs in my apartment seeing if the balnace is worst when i am on them..also(dont know if anyone else does this)but i will stand up and stomp my right foot for like ten mintues cause i think the tingleness will go away if i do that...of course it doesnt so i guess i should stop looking like i am stomping out ants and stuff here at work...but no you are not alone

chris

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waiting for answers

Oh Scoobyjude - definitely!

I usually have a number of things that tell me if I'm having a relapse the more I have the more worried I get - I usually can't do even 2 steps of heel-to-toe walking without falling over, I have no interest in shoe shopping, I go very pale with blue-ishh rings under my eyes, sway when I shut my eyes (allegedly!), energy comes in bursts and then goes completely. I have my dh plagued with "do you think I'm having a relapse" questions every 5 mins. I don't know how he hasn't divorced me!

The longer I have this wretched MS the more used I get to it.....but uncertainty is really horrible, the twilight zone of is it/isin't it?
Hope you're in the clear soon

Nope, definitely not crazy and certainly not alone.
"symptom watching" is something I bet the vast majority of us do: it's only to be expected if you are told you have a condition which is likely to get worse. It can actually be really useful when consulting doctors -- for instance, imagine telling a doctor you think you're getting worse and he/she asks why you think that; you can either say, "Hmmm...dunno really", or you can say, "well I do X three times a day, but now I can't do it any more".
The only thing wrong about it is that, yet again, we are all left to find our own way of doing things without any help -- perhaps it would be useful if, when we're diagnosed, we were given a chart of movements or exercises to do, so that we could regularly keep score and report back any changes, (although that would be a pretty demoralising diary to keep). I can't remember who it was, but somebody once posted here that they took an annual holiday to a cabin in the woods. Every year, they monitored how many logs they could chop, steps they could climb etc, and keep tally that way.
Think of it as "patient monitoring", and it doesn't seem half so crazy!

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Dom

I agree with you Dom but I want to temper one thing with caution. I have found out that my Dr. gets over enthusiastic in wanting to fix me. This has caused him to "knee-jerk" about my symptoms, so I don't tell him about random this or that anymore, only the stuff that has really stuck. Like if I tell him I've been having some incontinence (even if it's been very few and far between), he'll want me on Ditropan even though he knows I won't use that stuff anymore until absolutely forced.

So I agree it's good to know where you are, but not to the point where your symptom awareness becomes hypochondriacal (I hope that's a word)

Hi Lew,
I don't think it was a word but it is now.

I think the rule is that if one person says it and at least one other person understands what the hell he's talking about....it's a word.

Bob

The definition of hypochondriacal by the Free Dictionary.

I'm sorry, this was totally OT, but I just had to post this ;-)

Be well.

-finn

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"The great tragedy of science - the slaying of a beautiful hypothesis by an ugly fact.” -Thomas Henry Huxley

Thanks Finn!

WOW, that was quick! I thought it would be at least a week or so before it got into the dictionary!

Bob

Thanks everybody for your replies. I feel fine today and glad to know I'm not the only hypochronical one. (see-it's already catching!! )

I too have certain tests I give myself when I think I'm having a relapse. I try to run up stairs or fake tap dance for my legs. (yeah, I'm a dork) And for my hands I always see if I can snap. Even in my mild attacks I haven't been able to do these things. Yesterday I could but I still freaked myself out.

I always say that the next time I have a relapse I'm going to handle it calmer but I don't think I can actually do that. I guess I'm just glad I was wrong this time. Thanks again.

I honestly don't know how you people with MS stand it. I mean really, it's crap that shouldn't be happening regardless of whether EVERYONE else on the site has experienced it.

I read about MS related things every moment of my free time, yet when my wife asks me which of her aches are caused by overexertion, old age or MS I am at a complete loss.

It's pretty sad when you can be an expert on what is currently known about MS and still not know shit about MS.

Bob