Miss Vicki -
This is a problem my husband experienced. Last year he began losing walking ability along with bladder and bowel control. Sometimes he would just "go" and not even know he went. Adult Depends - yes - but they won't really contain very well a full "accident" - bowel or bladder - even with extra padding.
We quit going out in public very much for these problems as clean up was a nightmare in public. On the rare occassion we did go out - I only went places where I knew exactly where the handicap stall was located. Often out in public - I would take him to the restroom even when he said he didn't need to and often he would definitely "go". Also assembled a travel kit for the car - wipes, large towel for modesty, extra Depends, extra clothes, jug of water, paper towels, trash bags, gloves, lysol, etc...
At home, I put him (had to be lifted on and off) on the toliet multiple times per day to sit and especially within 30 minutes of eating. This helped a good deal.
My husband's fairly famous MS neuro would only recommend seeing a Gastro and a Uro for help with these problems. My husband had been on quiet a bit of steriods (oral and IV) and a total of six infusions of Novantrone in 2007 (double dose) without making a dent in his aggressive MS disease.
Now at the risk of getting harangued abit on this forum - my husband started a very aggressive protocol of multiple antibiotics in high doses back in the fall of 2007 to treat his very aggressive form of MS as an infection in his brain rather than just autoimmune disease bad luck. We were pretty much out of options so this one was easy to pick.
At first, as the infectious treating doctor warned, my husband got worse - significantly worse - then suddenly amazing improvements occurred. One of the first improvements he made was regaining control of both bowel and bladder. He has complete sensation again as to when he needs to eliminate in either way and can actually wait for a decent amount of time until a restroom is available. I won't post the rest of his improvements here as you specifically asked about this issue.
Part of his story is posted here in the regimes section and the full story complete with pictures is posted on another website. I am committed to updating his progress good or bad with this experimental treatment.
Who knows if it might work for you too - just throwing it out there. Having lived through this issue for quiet a while with my husband, I wish you all the best and applaud your openess in looking for solutions - as many doctors aren't even comfortable discussing this particularly gruesome reality of MS.