Honestly, I've been where you are and I know that nothing anybody says can really lift you out of there: in fact, sometimes the more " positive" people try to be around you the more depressing it can get. There they are, telling you that at least you're lucky to live in a beautiful place, or have great friends, or you're still the same person you always were, and you're left silently screaming that it's not enough – no amount of " lucky", no number of " blessings" – nothing will ever, ever, make you feel better about losing the life you once had, (or the life you should have had).
The fact is, Robbie, as the others have said your words on these pages are incredibly valuable to thousands of people around the world who read them. They can see that it's OK to feel the way they're feeling and that they are not alone… you are their voice. I can imagine people who can't get through to their family about what it's like, pointing at the screen and saying, " that's what I've been trying to tell you!".
Nobody wants you to go, but nobody will judge you if you feel you have to leave. I really believe that talking of bravery and cowardice, right and wrong, the easy way or the hard choice, have no relevance when it comes to this. It is what it is.
Whatever you decide you will take my love, blessing and gratitude with you and I am sure that is true of many, many others. I truly, sincerely hope we are not saying goodbye,