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Hello. I'm Eliza. I have been diagnosed with relapsing-remitting MS since 2003. I had a few symptoms since 2000 but was not diagnosed until 2003. I have not had any relapses since.
So why did I say LONG time for the topic? I joined a long time ago, but I have not really been talking on here and haven't visited here in a long time. I thought I'd drop in and say hello and give an update.
I have been having some weird things go on that are frustrating. The sudden urges to pee. My husband gets so frustrated with me when I have to literally run to the bathroom with little warning that I actually had to go. It's not every day, but when it does happen, it is usually at a most inconvenient time. I feel like one of those pipe characters from the bladder control commercials from TV. I also will leak sometimes when I don't feel like I have to go, but that's usually when I'm sick and coughing/sneezing a lot. The most frustrating issue I have is the trapezius muscle spasms. They can get so strong that I get dizzy, I can't breathe, and sometimes I lose circulation in my legs. I usually have to sit again or even lay down for a minute while the symptoms calm themselves before getting back up. It usually happens form a seated position too so that kind of sucks as I'm often sitting during the day. It rarely happens in the morning when I get up from a laying down position. I don't even mind the occasional leak compared to this issue. There really isn't anything I can do as I need to be the one driving and a lot of muscle relaxants would require me to not drive. The weaker ones are not strong enough and pain meds do nothing. The heat just messes things up for me. I get fatigued, grouchy, slow, my legs get weak easily, I have even passed out! I just don't like being outside when it's Summer. Thank goodness the Fall is coming! This is the first time in a long time that my MS has actually affected me.
I had twin boys who are now 4 years old. They've been so much fun. It's challenging, but really, such a joy! I worry a little bit. It's only a thought in the back of my mind, but it does surface every now and then. I worry that my MS will return as it's almost been 10 years. I have read that if a woman is diagnosed with RRMS before getting pregnant and has a full term pregnancy, if her MS comes out of remission, it is more likely to continue to be benign and not advance to a more aggressive type. I really hope that is true, but I can't assume it to be. My husband does not work. I'm currently looking for a job. If I become disabled, my husband will not be able to support us. My parents have been super through all this, but they are getting old and are close to retirement. We will do everything we can to keep this family going, but I cannot help but have a concern about this. I am on Avonex and trying to stay healthy. I'm on a diet and trying to stay more active than I have been. I'm not shaking with anxiety over this concern, but I do wonder what else I can do. I would love to go back to school in order to get a better paying job. Medical assisting does not cover the bills for a family of 4 with only one person working. I just cannot afford to go back to school now and with both my parents paying for us to live, I refuse to ask them for more money. Neither of my parents are willing to have us move in. It would be a HUGE move for us to even do so. My father is in a small city apartment and my mother is currently downgrading to a small town home since she is only living with her husband. She's got cancer so her health is also a concern. So, this is my life. The only thing I can do at this point is find a job and do what I can and stay as healthy as I can. I just wish MS wasn't such an unpredictable MonSter. I love surprises...just not the MS kind of surprises.
_________________
I'm a little acorn brown,
Lying on the cold bare ground.
Someone came and stepped on me.
That is why I'm cracked you see.
I'm a nut! I'm a nut! I'm a nut! ...
-Childhood song
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