Newly diagnosed, now more scared than ever!

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Newly diagnosed, now more scared than ever!

Postby Gwyzz » Wed Oct 01, 2014 10:02 pm

So I was diagnosed on 9/25/14. In February of this year, I had a scare with my left eye, which led to an MRI, which found 2 lesions, which sent me to a neuro which led to discussions of other symptoms, which led to an MRi on my neck, which found no lesions but did find degenerative disc disease, which led to blood tests and another mri on my brain, blood tests were negative for anything, and 2nd brain mri showed no new lesions, which led to a evoked potential which was negative, which then led to a lumber puncture (at this point I have decided that I really am just crazy, and I must be imagining all these symptoms if there really is nothing proving that they are there) my neuro's assistant assured me that while i am doing all these tests they are not just looking for one specific diagnosis, but they are also eliminating a whole slew of other things this might be, ok so onto the lumbar puncture, 3 days after that procedure my neuro actually calls me personally to tell me that the findings in the lp along with my initial mri and symptoms says that this is ms. So initially I am slightly relieved, considering how long some have had to battle this without a definitive diagnosis I'm pretty lucky. Wait what the hell!?! I am not lucky my dr just told me I have a chronic illness that I will battle the rest of my life...OMG! So what now, I'm thinking no he is wrong it can't be, what am I going to do? So met with my neuro, going to start on Tecfidera, just waiting on the pharmacy to contact me. Is it possible that I am having a delayed reaction to the bad news was or am I in denial, because now one week later I'm suddenly feeling sorry for myself, just want to sit down and cry, really want to know why life keeps throwing roadblocks in my way. Just really don't know what to do or how to handle this situation. Please tell me that I am not crazy and not the only one whoever felt like this?
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Re: Newly diagnosed, now more scared than ever!

Postby ElliotB » Wed Oct 01, 2014 11:30 pm

Grieving is normal. It will pass. There are numerous ways to help you deal with the feelings/emotions you are going through - family, friends, doctors, medications - consider an emotional support animal..

"I am not lucky"

Actually, yes you are. While the best news would be to have nothing, the bad news could have been a lot worse than MS. Be happy it is only MS!
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Re: Newly diagnosed, now more scared than ever!

Postby specialk1180 » Thu Oct 02, 2014 10:35 am

gwyzz, i hear you. i've only had my dx for just over a month now, so i get it! i'm still processing it now, and from what i've heard from some others, even the first year or two can be tough as you adjust. i try to remind myself to be glad i got a dx because there are so many people who go years and years with awful symptoms etc, but have no recourse to treat them, because they can't get an actual diagnosis. i'm glad you came to this site for support because so far i have found the folks here to be extremely welcoming, knowledgeable, and understanding. you are not alone!!! sure, some days will be worse than others. sure, sometimes you might cry about it. it does suck, you bet, no way around it. sorry. BUT not all days will be bad, just remember that! so far anyway, that's what helps me to keep from falling into the sadness. learn as much as you can, but don't dwell on doom and gloom sites; be sure to read the constructive stuff!! lots of people live long and pretty healthy lives with ms. i don't know your specifics of course, but am just trying to share what helped me in the very very beginning... for me, i'm (still) trying to absorb this dx as almost like a life-affirming reminder to stop, slow down, stop being so damn stressed, and take care of body and mind.

from a fellow newbie ~ keep your chin up :) one of my new favorite quotes is: "On particularly rough days when I’m sure I can’t possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100%... and that’s pretty good."
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Re: Newly diagnosed, now more scared than ever!

Postby Youarethecure » Fri Oct 03, 2014 10:08 pm

We have all been there. I was in a depression for over 2 months, and also in denial as I did not get diagnosed yet. But I had a lot of symptoms.... which i pretended werent real.. or something idk haha.

I cried many times through the process..... and this coming from a 25 year old male.

We have every right in the world to be mad, angry, upset, frustrated etc.... But with that being said, we also have every right in the world to be happy and enjoy life.

I use that dark place I was at as a reminder that as long as I am not there, I am doing awesome. I appreciate life so much more now.... when I am doing well. But even when I am not, I know the better times will soon be back. We just have to sit back and endure it until it ends.

There is no "wrong way" to handle this disease. Whatever helps you get through a day.

There is much information to be learned about medication, diet, nutrition, exercise, lifestyle, sun exposure, yoga, chiropractors, etc etc etc. There are many things you can do to fight back as best as you can. Once you learn about all that and you will realize it doesnt have to be soooooooooo bad.

Why did you decide to go with that drug?
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