A girl walked into a bar and asked the barman for a double entendre. So he gave her one!

Hugging is healthy: It helps the body’s immunity system, it keeps you healthier, it cures depression, it reduces stress, it induces sleep, it’s invigorating, and hugging is nothing less than a miracle drug.

Hugging is all natural: It is organic, naturally sweet, no pesticides, no preservatives, no artificial ingredients and 100 percent wholesome.

Hugging is practically perfect: There are no movable parts, no batteries to wear out, no periodic checkups, low energy consumption, high energy ...

How NIH Officials Actually Convince People to Review Grant Applications

Editor's Note: The following is a top-secret transcript of an actual conversation between a Scientific Review Administrator (SRA) and a potential recruit to join a study section.

That SRA, that SRA!
I do not like that SRA!

Would you review grants today?

I would not like to, SRA
I do not want to, go away.

You could review grants here or there!
You could review ...

Just Another Dissertation - by Christina Petersen

God loosened his tie and hoped the committee would go easy on him. He faced five professors seated in the front row of the biology department conference room.

Zeus spoke first. "Very nice presentation, God," he said, looking over his wire-rimmed reading glasses at the nervous student. Zeus was chair of the department of biology. He sported bushy white eyebrows and a long mane of white hair. Zeus ...

How to Prove It

Proof by example: The author gives only the case n = 2 and suggests that it contains most of the ideas of the general proof.

Proof by intimidation - "Trivial."

Proof by vigorous handwaving - Works well in a classroom or seminar setting.

Proof by cumbersome notation - Best done with access to at least four alphabets and special symbols.

Proof by exhaustion - An issue or two of a journal ...

Matz's rule regarding medications: A drug is a substance which, when injected into a rat, will produce a scientific report.

Tenenbaum's law of replicability: The most interesting results happen only once.

"After two years of trying, scientists at the Yerkes Regional Primate center have managed to get a chimpanzee pregnant." - Scientist, December 26, 1988.

"Sexist terminology in chemistry should be combated by changing helium to he/shelium, manganese to personganese and mendelevium to peopledelevium." - ...

The UK MS Society is selling tracksuits. Is it just me, but I wouldn't be seen dead in a tracksuit advertising that I had MS. Also, given that mobility problems etc are common - when would one wear such a costume? At the tennis club, playing football etc?

http://www.mssociety.org.uk/get_involve ... suits.html

nothing to do with ms, but what the hell, isn't laughter the best medicine??

http://www.theonion.com/content/index

read the whole alligator study. oh my freakin god it's hilarious

Hi all,

Time to reveal my other favorite Website
http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com

It's a website featuring professional writers who write recaps of television shows and forums for discussing shows. It's a dual American/Canadian website so it focuses on shows from those countries but there are also threads for shows from other countries (like Sabado Gigante, New Zealand Idol, Queer as Folk)

Three warnings though:
1) The humor is very dark. For example: the thread about how disability ...