This Is MS Multiple Sclerosis Knowledge & Support Community

Hello everybody,

I have registed on this forum to try and find out more about my mothers disease. She was diagnosed 14 years ago (she is now 56 years old).

It was only today that it really hit home how bad my mother is. I helped my dad move them into a new house that is suitable for a wheelchair etc.

My concerns are for the next few years. She is at the stage where she can basically do nothing for herself. My dad is 60 years old (he is a big strong guy) but is starting to find it hard to look after her...its a 24hr a day job and it is wearing him down.

Where does this disease end??....what will eventually happen to her?

Is there a time when she simply cannot be looked after by one (oldish)person?

Kevin

Hi Kevin

Welcome to the forum. It's really admirable you're concerned about both of your parents well being, now and in the future.

I don't think there are any easy answers to your questions about what may eventually happen to your mother's abilities and your father's ability to care for her as he himself ages. MS is well known for being unpredictable. For many, it is progressively disabling over the course of many years. It is not necessarily a fatal disease.

Some people with MS and their families may need and appreciate assistance from others at some point. Arrangments can be made to have others come into the home to assist with care. Or, at some point a decision might be made that a move to an assisted living facility or a nursing home might be better for everyone if the care needs become too demanding. There is no way that I know of to predict if that will be the case for any one person.

I've had experience with a father with Parkinson's disease. For several years we had care givers come into the home to assist both my father and my mother. Eventually my father's care became too much for my mother (86) even under those circumstances and a decision was made by the family and including my father that care in a nursing home would be better for everyone.

No matter what, I think it will be important for your father to take care of himself as well. I have no idea what services might be available in Australia but if there's a possibility that arrangements could be made to have someone help your father care for your mother at home they might really both appreciate it. IMO everyone needs support, including your father.

I guess, as someone told me (I'm 59 with MS) it may help to plan for the worst but expect only the best about what may be ahead for your mother.

Best wishes to you and your family.

Sharon

Hi Kevin

Your mom is the age I was when I had the misadventure that became my PPMS. That was almost 11 years ago and now, thanks to 18 months of the antibiotics protocol spelled out in CPn Help, I am on the long road back to being a very functional person. Please visit us. I had nothing to lose then, definitely not so now.

Rica

Rica - How interesting the way you phrased that! I, too, felt I had nothing to lose and everything to regain when I started antibiotics. The autoimmune theory just never made sense to me, but an insidious bacteria that affects every body and body system differently DOES make sense to me. I'm glad you encouraged him to try CPn Help.org . We'll help him (and her) all we can over there.