This Is MS Multiple Sclerosis Knowledge & Support Community

This is my first MS forum I've ever been on, so I don't really know what to expect. My mother, a nurse, was diagnosed with MS-relapsing/remitting in December of 2009. I was 18 years old and a freshman in college so I didn't really care/understand what this diagnosis was going to mean for my family. I'm now 22 years old and a month away from graduating from nursing school. I'm now MUCH more aware of MS and feeling the impact on my family heavily. So I guess what led me here is the hope of finding answers on how to speak to my mother about the impact her emotional lability and her lack of recognizing it is having on my family...

Not sure what treatment your mother is using but if she is listening to the doctors that there is no hope that could be very emotional. Since your mother is in the medical system she may not be receptive to the information but the choice should be hers. The best thing to do is let your mother know there is hope for treating MS if you follow the right treatment. People do get better and live normal lives when they do the right thing. May help to share Dr. Bergman's video with your mother.

MS daughter, people may recommend alternative therapies, vitamins, diet, or exercise but what is likely the issue is depression brought on by dealing with a diagnosis that has no cure, and a bleak outlook. I sank into a deep depression after my diagnosis in 2012. I had basically convinced myself i wouldn't be walking within 5 years, and would be bedridden within 10. Ultimately becoming a burden to my young family and die of an infection from bedsores. After feeling sorry for myself for long enough I faced the fact that I am the primary provider for my wife and sons now 2 and 4 and that I could not afford to let this happen. I had a responsibility to provide for my family and stay as healthy as possible for as long as possible.

Your mom may feel she does not have this reason, a purpose to explore all possibilities to treat this illness. You and your sister are grown up, moving out, and don't need her anymore, she has obviously worked a long hard life as a nurse. Giving up is easy, and if she is a nurse she probably hasn't seen a lot of easy. But has seen the worst of every disease.

My recommendation is you remind her she is still needed. Your family will not function the same without her taking charge, her opinion matters, whatever it takes to get her to realize she has value. Give her something to look forward to, help her adopt a regimen, any regimen that will give her back some control. Show her examples of people with MS where it is a minor inconvenience and not impacted life or happiness. I applaud you for trying and wish you the best of luck.

http://intelligentguidetoms.wordpress.com/

Hi, buy the book by Judy Grahan MS Naturally it save my life when I was first Diagnosed loads help on diets.
Sue

MSdaughter1 wrote:This is my first MS forum I've ever been on, so I don't really know what to expect. My mother, a nurse, was diagnosed with MS-relapsing/remitting in December of 2009. I was 18 years old and a freshman in college so I didn't really care/understand what this diagnosis was going to mean for my family. I'm now 22 years old and a month away from graduating from nursing school. I'm now MUCH more aware of MS and feeling the impact on my family heavily. So I guess what led me here is the hope of finding answers on how to speak to my mother about the impact her emotional lability and her lack of recognizing it is having on my family...

As you are discovering, MS is a disease that slices the patient and family members one piece at a time and over a long period, it can be devastating to everyone around it.

My wife had MS for over 35 years. (she passed away in 2007) I know what it is like to watch someone both physically and emotionally go downhill with this disease. Trying to stay ahead of the problems can prove very difficult and requires not only the use of medications that work for the patient but also an all encompassing regiment of proper exercise, diet and support from family and friends. The big problem is that what works for one patient may be totally useless for the next. One only need to look at the results of those patients who choose to try some of the powerful immune system altering drugs.

I think it is important to come under the care of a good MS clinic that provides all around kind of care for your mother's physical and emotional needs. She needs outside counseling for her depression. You may think you can help in this area but your mother isn't likely to listen too much to someone who is so close to her.

And like Kronk said...be careful of advice from those who suggest the medical establishment is bad and non listening to your needs. While everyone is entitled to his/her opinion, some people can be very narrow minded when it comes to what's good and not good for MS.

I wish your mother the best luck in dealing with this disease. You've come to the right forum to obtain as much info as you can from those who are very involved with MS. And please remember, MS patients react extremely differently to the treatments that are out there. Finding the right one for your mother is the challenge.

welcome to the forum msd sorry to hear your mum is having a bad time.

5 years is plenty of time to get over the initial shock. what is her attitude like about her illness? what are her symptoms, other than EL?

if you are interested discussing in any of the nutrition science that has been completed related to ms i will be happy to connect. the diet/nutrition issue flies under the radar of many if not most doctors, in my experience. how do the nursing schools do on that score?