This Is MS Multiple Sclerosis Knowledge & Support Community

Hello to everyone from Athens, Greece!

Im kaizen aka Thanos, 29 years old, and i have MS. I'm married to a wonderful woman who makes the sun shine brighter for me (no she is not reading this...). I hate my underpaid job, which requires me to commute for a full hour in the morning and another one in the afternoon, but on the other hand, im glad i at least have a job...

On October 2006 (happy birthday lessions) i found myself in an MRI tube wondering if my brain will look good for the photo shoot. Well, the neurologist didnt like the way it looked and he said i have multiple sclerosis. Honestly, i felt relieved that i finally found out what was happening to me. Can't say it wasnt a shock, cause it was. My wife was devastated, and in my opinion has flirted with depression since (I'm so glad she asked for help on her own and now sees a therapist, as i do).

Last April, the neuro i was seeing then, suggested that i should start Rebif, but i didnt (I chickened out honestly). As the summer passed, i found myself with permanent disability (mostly on my left leg) and convinced myself to start Rebif. Have taken five shots till now, and this past week and a half have been quite challenging cause of the flu like symptoms and the extreme fatigue (had this one before the drug, but i think it has worsened).

Tell you the truth, im determined not to let MS get in the way of me living a normal life, have kids and provide for them. I want to have vacations abroad, and explore the beauty of my own country. I want a better job, that will at least require me to put some of the skills I acquired in college in use... (btw, anyone has any suggestions on telecommuting jobs for marketers?). Ive already applied to Universities to get a second degree, and i really hope i receive a "fat" envelope in two weeks! Im determined to be strong and get the best out of everything.

But its tough... Dear God it's so hard sometimes... Makes me want to scream! I feel noone can understand the battle in my body and my mind, even if they want to... Besides, the "ghost" is invisible (ghost is the name i've given to the invisible guy who tackles and pushes me all the time and makes me walk like i do). They cant see or feel the "ghost". But im hoping to find people who will know what im talking about in here...

Im sorry for the length of this post, but I assure you, this was deeply therapeutic! Thank you so much if you've come this far, and I'll be delighted to read any comments!

Sincerely,

Kaizen

Welcome to the site Kaizen, I'm glad you found it.

The length of the post was just fine, we all know you that much better now!

You'll find lots of people here who, although they might refer to it as the "monster" rather than the "ghost", share the same things you do.

Bob

Welcome Kaizen,

I'm new here too and have found the site extremely informative, interesting and welcoming. I visited Athens a few years ago while touring Greece and fell for its charms. One lingering memory is of seeing a man on his hands and knees checking for buried antiquities amongst the rubble next to a team of road workers.

It's perfectly ok to vent here, and say what's on your mind, pool ideas and experiences.

Look forward to reading your posts in the future,

Elia

Hi Kaizen,
Welcome to the site. Sounds to me like you're approaching this disease with good humour and determination, which is a great combination. Therapy for you and your wife is an excellent idea – the psychological and emotional impact of a diagnosis like this is often overlooked by the medical profession, who concentrate on the physical symptoms – and anthropomorphising your ghost into " the guy who pushes you around" makes him much less intimidating.
You're right about the invisibility thing: nobody else can see the exhaustion; the pain; the fear, which makes the attitude of other people hard to deal with sometimes. Living where you do, do you find that the heat affects you much?

Hey Kaizen

Welcome to the site, it sure is nice to see that you seem to be coping (as best anyone can!) with this disease and that you and your wife have sought help when you needed it. Although I wouldwish that you did not have reason to be here, at least I hope that you find this site to be as helpful, friendly, informative, and compassionate as I have.
Your post was great - good to know a little bit about you & I look forward to hearing more.

All the best.

Gia sou from Portland OR. Hang in there man. You are not alone. We are all here to support you on this site. Take care.

Thank you all for your replies! Feels so good to finally communicate with people who know what im talking about... Just know that each and every one of you is deeply appreciated!

@TwistedHelix: The heat does get to me... To make things worse, this past summer was the warmest one in decades in Greece. We went to London in July, and we boarded the plane with 49 celcius. When we arrived it was raining and i loved it! Wife was bummed though...

Hi Kiizen,

Nice to hear from you. This is a great site for sharing your experience, thoughts, and feelings. Don't worry about the length of your post, my first one was a lot longer.

I wanted to say something to you about Rebif. The flu like symptoms are tough, but they should pass with time. I've been on it for about nine months, and my chills and fever have finally passed. Till then, try ibuprofen about an hour before injection, it really helped me.

I know what you mean about not letting MS get in your way. I feel the same way - refusing to take the elevator instead of the stairs even when the climb makes you feel like your chest is being crushed - walking to the office even though you're stiff and numb on the left side when you get there. You just don't want to let go of all the things you could do before MS. I say keep up the fight as long as you can. They're only symptoms, and for me at least, the subside with a bit of time.

Hang in there man, you're not alone. I look forward to hearing from you again.

kaizen wrote: Ive already applied to Universities to get a second degree, and i really hope i receive a "fat" envelope in two weeks!

I'm in! I'm in!

Now i have to juggle the exams and courses, the nasty job and the MS "thing". I think I'll make it...

Sincerely,

Kaizen

Hello and welcome Kaizen,

I think in japanese your name translates to continuous improvement. In my line of work (automotive), we have "kaizen teams" that work on making things more efficient. Anyway, welcome to the board. I hope you get used to the side fx of rebif. I got worse with Avonex, but it was after 2 years or so. Good luck with the school and "life load". You can do it. Just take it one day at a time. After years with MS (7), you learn what that truly means more and more all the time. welcome!

Loobie wow! You're the first i've met, who knows what it means! Thank you for the warm welcome...

Cheers,

Kaizen