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25 (had to drop out of college)...what to do now?

Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2012 3:34 pm
by Kquestions
I have my productive periods but when an exacerbation hits,I can be down for months.
I can only do a couple things a day, my fatigue is so bad, along with my other symptoms.
In May, I decided not to go back to college because my MS was so bad, last semester,I barely made it to the end.
I am feeling like a failure.
I cannot complete my degree after 5 years of trying, I cannot get a job, I cannot take care of the house, or my husband, someday(s).
What should I do now?
What can I do, to be a productive member of this family(I push myself to the limit just to make things work)?

Re: 25 (had to drop out of college)...what to do now?

Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 6:38 pm
by jimmylegs
heya, sorry to hear you're feeling low.

you ever looked at the nutritional side of ms? there's lots you can do with diet, bloodwork, and supplements. a diet assessment is one of the easiest ways to figure out if a nutritional approach will be useful. if you were to post a 3-day diet diary, with detailed info for all food and drink ingested over a typical 3 day period (eg two work days, one day off), we could look for action items.

other than that, welcome to the forum :) lots of different ideas, here, nutrition's just my personal fave :D

Re: 25 (had to drop out of college)...what to do now?

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 4:39 pm
by goatgirl
Maybe redefine what you want, and address the physical and emotional feelings you're having through various meds, supplements, and exercise regimens. There is a lot of information on that within these forums. Taking care of a house is overrated, I can't help ya on that front! :) I'm the only one in my house that the dirt bothers, so instead of letting it mentally defeat me, I eventually decided if my husband and kids can ignore it, I'm better off letting it go and embracing the filth (except for the bathrooms!)

What was it about MS that made school difficult? Were you going full time? Was there a physical on campus component? Cognitive fog? 5 years is nothing, don't let that get to you. I've been going to school off and on for like 15+ years, and finally graduated last May. I'm telling you, it can be done, so don't give up. I stopped when I was 20 to have a family, then went back when I was in my 30's. The year I was applying to my graduate pharmacy program was when my MS journey began, and school became the bane of my existence. The heat and walking at the University of Arizona campus was too exhausting and I was fried by the time I had to get kid #1 to swim lessons before picking up kid #2 from bagpipe practice, etc. Daily routines were impossible to maintain. When I tried to seek help through the school, I got the vibe like I was a lazy "adult learner" who was just a pansy regarding Arizona's heat. Those bastards were dead to me after that and I withdrew from the school. Like you're feeling now, I thought school was no longer an option for me and really felt like I had nothing to contribute as far as being a productive member of society, of a family.

I was a pre-pharmacy student that only needed two more semesters to graduate, and had a 4.0 GPA. My ensuing years off, it just needled me to walk away from the classes I had completed with nothing to show for them. Last year I found many online programs which solved several of my problems, so I went back, and graduated from Northern Arizona University last May. I saved many hours between commuting and walking in the heat, school was streamlined in a sense, and I had more energy for the other elements of life. The program met my needs and was enough that school became achievable.

If you were overloaded, how about 1 class at a time? If cognitive fog was part of it, I second the nutrition element, a little bit of zinc may go a long way in remedying that. If fatigue was the issue, have you tried something like Nuvigil or Provigil? If there were physical on campus issues, try working with the campus or find a new institution that can address the issues.

I'm not sure what to say about work. Etsy.com has opened up a lot of doors to some crafty friends of mine that are somewhat homebound and need flexible schedules.

I think you need to first address feeling like a failure. You're not a failure...you're just in a bad spot right now. Don't let MS take you there. Pick one thing, address it, triumph over it, succeed. Tomorrow, pick two. I don't always accomplish what I want. This time of the year with the heat I rarely accomplish a fraction of what I can most of the year. I changed what I personally defined as failure within my life. We no longer have the same bodies we had pre-MS, and it's unfair to judge ourselves by those past standards. It might take longer to get through school now, but you can do it. The career or work that you settle on may be different than you originally dreamed, but you can still do something. We're rooting for you.