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fed up

Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 8:51 am
by jimmylegs
okay any of you caregivers out there get really fed up with a sad sack of a sick person? if so how do you deal? because i fail to handle an ongoing whiny irritable fatalistic attitude - clearly, so not my style. any tips appreciated. it's not like it's a few days, i have reached the end of my tether after months and months and it's getting worse not better. doctor says all we can do is wait, so we're going to wait. very proactive. grr.

Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 12:07 pm
by cheerleader
hey JL-
Sorry it's gotten more difficult. Must be hard to deal with. I know you're not fatalistic or dark...at all.

A little caregiver tip: Just remember, you are not responsible for anyone else's health or happiness....you can attend to their needs, but the rest is up to THEM. Take time for yourself, don't let the negative energy bring you down. Make a little force field shield of joy around yourself when you're near this person.

Healing doesn't mean disease goes away. Healing means acceptance. Miracles would be nice (!) but we all eventually die, anyway. It's how we choose to spend our limited days here on earth that makes the diff. You know that!

hang in there-
cheer

Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 12:50 pm
by jimmylegs
thanks cheer. it's just so frustrating when there are things that *could* be helping. and this person has watched me go through my whole process and was right there when all my breakthroughs happened... but i guess all that only applies to me :evil: NOT
my force shield integrity is very low right now, it is easily penetrated by the ongoing heaving of sighs or bursts of temper... i have been definitely hiding away from it. sometimes it seeks me out, unfortunately. but i do have some fun things on the go too. this weekend is sound of music festival. i'd be going tonight if i'd finished my essay on track, but i didn't, so too bad it'll have to be tomorrow instead ;)
thanks again for the support :) i'm going back to my sunny music room with my books, far from the gloom and the incessant drone of the television.

Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 5:10 pm
by carolew
hang in there JL. You are not alone....

Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 7:21 pm
by jimmylegs
thanks carole!!!!

Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 6:02 am
by Artifishual
Give em some antifreeze and water, LOL, that'll shut em up :twisted:

Sorry dude I could not resist.

Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 6:06 am
by jimmylegs
heh :) i got punched in the face the other day, it's so fun here. i'm leaving for a week today.

Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 6:31 am
by Artifishual
Post a picture before you leave , Please I want to see it

Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 6:59 am
by jimmylegs
it's just a jaw bruise nothing special like a black eye :)

Posted: Fri Jun 20, 2008 7:01 am
by Artifishual
Still wanna see it 8O

Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 6:50 pm
by jimmylegs
well, i'm back, and the surface bruise is gone but there's still this weird lump on the jawbone. it doesn't hurt though. is that normal? is it just some kind of really hard local swelling?
anyway i'm hiding away from the rest of the household and i'll go stay with friends for the next couple of months. i need to be around people that aren't insane.

Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 6:20 pm
by jimmylegs
still have that weird lump on the jawbone. maybe it'll be permanent? i've been starting to house hunt, but the finances won't add up til september or october. at least i have a respite since 'they' are away for 2wks right now. and at other times friends are providing temporary places to vanish to.
my favourite quote: "i can't believe i hit you" um, does that mean there's something unbelievable about this time in particular?

Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 6:36 pm
by cheerleader
Hey Jimmy-
been concerned about you, haven't seen your name popping up on the boards. I'm glad you've been away from the drama, and that you'll have some time at home on your own. Your jaw might take awhile to heal. Sounds like it's still swollen. Are you able to close your mouth and chew OK? If so, you'll probably be alright.

Abusers are always sorry...too late! Just because they don't have any control over their anger and lash out without thinking, they act surprised after the fact. arghhh!!! I broke the chain of violence in my family, and I know you have, too. Stay away as long as you're able.
best,
AC

Posted: Wed Jul 23, 2008 6:49 pm
by jimmylegs
heya cheer thanks for your concern. i'm okay, i have been keeping an eye on things here, but i just don't have much to contribute right now i guess. i can close my jaw and all about as well as i could before, what with prior injuries :roll:
thanks cheer, i have broken it thoroughly, aside from the ongoing fun times which have recently re-surfaced. you've done better than i, i took the cop-out and decided no kids for this gal! i will definitely be staying away. as soon as i find a place, that's it. and when i can afford it, back to the west coast i go. absence makes the heart grow normal, in this family.

Posted: Thu Aug 14, 2008 5:45 am
by Loobie
Hey Legs,

I have an unexplained bump that won't go away after a bruise too. Maybe it's an MS thing. I tripped over the damn dog tether on a camping trip about two months ago and even though there is zero pain, it still has this hard bump. Weird, but it doesn't hurt so that's a good thing. Sorry to hear about your families propencity for abuse. That can't be fun.