Better Living Through Science
Posted: Sun May 16, 2010 2:18 pm
Okay, those of you who listened to last week's testimony before the Canadian parliamentary sub-committee will get this. The doctors who were advocating against immediate treatment and for more scientific study were quite the bunch were they not? Well, I encountered a song at the end of a computer game called "Portal" this morning and it reminded me of them (fun game, by the way, if you're into that sort of thing). I borrowed a few lines, changed a few and added several more to express my feelings about the opposition:
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Better Living Through Science
Each study a triumph, every experiment a success.
Enamored with my own intellectual largesse.
We do what we must,
In Science we trust.
Except the ones who are dead.
But there's no sense crying over every blunder.
I’ll keep on trying till they’re all six feet under.
And the Science gets finished.
While you subjects are diminished.
For the people who are still alive.
Please don’t be angry. We just need to be sure.
My Science is pristine, and my motives so pure.
Even though you feel burned,
Think of all that we learned
For the people who are still alive.
Look at me still talking when there's Science to do.
When I hear of your troubles, it makes me glad I'm not you.
But I've experiments to run.
There is research to be done.
On the people who are still alive.
I really don’t understand all the uproar and commotion,
This Science will save you if you give it your devotion.
Just make your donation,
To the MS foundation.
As long as you are still alive.
Good Science takes time, several years at the least,
Even longer for our high standards to be appeased.
I’m sure you will thank us,
When you come to your senses.
I can’t believe you are still alive.
And believe me I am still alive.
I'm doing Science and I'm still alive.
I feel FANTASTIC and I'm still alive.
While you're dying I'll be still alive.
And when you're dead I will be still alive.
STILL ALIVE
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Better Living Through Science
Each study a triumph, every experiment a success.
Enamored with my own intellectual largesse.
We do what we must,
In Science we trust.
Except the ones who are dead.
But there's no sense crying over every blunder.
I’ll keep on trying till they’re all six feet under.
And the Science gets finished.
While you subjects are diminished.
For the people who are still alive.
Please don’t be angry. We just need to be sure.
My Science is pristine, and my motives so pure.
Even though you feel burned,
Think of all that we learned
For the people who are still alive.
Look at me still talking when there's Science to do.
When I hear of your troubles, it makes me glad I'm not you.
But I've experiments to run.
There is research to be done.
On the people who are still alive.
I really don’t understand all the uproar and commotion,
This Science will save you if you give it your devotion.
Just make your donation,
To the MS foundation.
As long as you are still alive.
Good Science takes time, several years at the least,
Even longer for our high standards to be appeased.
I’m sure you will thank us,
When you come to your senses.
I can’t believe you are still alive.
And believe me I am still alive.
I'm doing Science and I'm still alive.
I feel FANTASTIC and I'm still alive.
While you're dying I'll be still alive.
And when you're dead I will be still alive.
STILL ALIVE