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Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Mon Apr 08, 2013 10:57 am
by Cece
http://news.yahoo.com/annette-funicello ... 21939.html
In 1995, she appeared briefly in a television docudrama based on her book. And she spoke openly about the degenerative effects of MS.
"My equilibrium is no more; it's just progressively getting worse," she said. "But I thank God I just didn't wake up one morning and not be able to walk. You learn to live with it. You learn to live with anything, you really do."
"You learn to live with anything, you really do."

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Mon Apr 08, 2013 6:13 pm
by marcstck
After seeing the horrendous state she was in in the CTV piece last year, upon hearing news of her death all I could feel was relief. Of course, every death is sad, but the life she was living was no life. MS had reduced her to a brain trapped in a prison of useless flesh and bone. At least now her suffering is at an end.

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 1:05 am
by LR1234
I agree Marc x I plan to write a living will as the situation she found herself in is not one I want to be in ever.

My thoughts go to her hubby who cared for her for so long and to her family and friends xx

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 4:51 am
by cg50in
My Dad had same ppms. Looked just like her near the end after 30 yr battle. What a miserable disease. He was same age as her also when he passed. Too many eery similarities. I feel fortuante I am in remission but I also need to get a living will. No way I end up like that. No way. May she RIP. God bless her husband

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 6:26 am
by erinc14
:sad:

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 8:11 am
by HappyPoet
My condolences to her family and friends.

Only now do I realize I had immediately gone into denial after I had seen her in the video. And only now, with my denial in tatters, do I truly understand what a friend meant by this being his "line in the sand."

Yes, it's time to complete a living will.

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 9:36 am
by vesta
I think it was very generous and courageous of her to have figured in the CTV piece. My condolences and sympathy for her family and friends.

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Tue Apr 09, 2013 2:03 pm
by 1eye
Remember her as she was. We grew up with her. She gave us a lot. I remember her vivacity in her movies and on TV. Forget how she looked in the CTV show. If I end up as she did, so be it, but I hope I am remembered in my better times. Au revoir, Annette.

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2013 1:02 pm
by Cece

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Thu Apr 18, 2013 2:00 am
by centenarian100
marcstck wrote:After seeing the horrendous state she was in in the CTV piece last year, upon hearing news of her death all I could feel was relief. Of course, every death is sad, but the life she was living was no life. MS had reduced her to a brain trapped in a prison of useless flesh and bone. At least now her suffering is at an end.
Everyone has their own personal views about end of life care and what level of disability or quality of life would be considered acceptable.

Hopefully, her wish for continued aggressive care was expressed to her husband as she was declining.

I believe that she gave her husband a lot of joy even in the very end just as a helpless infant or profoundly mentally/physically disabled child gives great joy to a parent.

As to what Annette was feeling, we will never know. Maybe she enjoyed the simple comforts given to her by her husband more than you and I could ever realize.

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Sun Apr 21, 2013 9:37 pm
by ljelome
centenarian100 wrote: I believe that she gave her husband a lot of joy even in the very end just as a helpless infant or profoundly mentally/physically disabled child gives great joy to a parent.

As to what Annette was feeling, we will never know. Maybe she enjoyed the simple comforts given to her by her husband more than you and I could ever realize.
Thank u for ur kind words... as an disabled person the feeling becoming a burden for our caregivers is a very heavily burdening thoughts...Yeah, we should think the opposite, that we can be the source of joy for people around us. A smile, a "thank u", would be very meaningful for our caregivers.

As for the person with this debilitating illness, a comforting partner would be highly needed. Someone who can understand us, our feelings, our emotions, our needs, showing the care not only in the form of words but actions too.

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Mon Apr 22, 2013 12:42 pm
by centenarian100
ljelome wrote:Thank u for ur kind words... as an disabled person the feeling becoming a burden for our caregivers is a very heavily burdening thoughts...Yeah, we should think the opposite, that we can be the source of joy for people around us. A smile, a "thank u", would be very meaningful for our caregivers.

As for the person with this debilitating illness, a comforting partner would be highly needed. Someone who can understand us, our feelings, our emotions, our needs, showing the care not only in the form of words but actions too.
I think that you have a wonderful attitude :-D

I believe that disabled people can live as happy and as full lives as healthy people with the right attitude and the right support.

I feel that we have to seek a balance between trying to advocate for ourselves and improving our situation and trying to make the best out of our situation.

Here is one of my favorite passages from Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People, 1936."

"Abe Lincoln once remarked that ‘most folks are about as happy as they make their minds to be’. He was right. I saw a vivid illustration of that truth as I was walking up the stairs of the Long Island Railroad station in New York. Directly in front of me thirty or forty crippled boys on canes and crutches were struggling up the stairs. One boy had to be carried up. I was astonished at their laughter and gaiety. I spoke about it to one of the men in charge of the boys. “Oh yes,” he said, “when a boy realizes that he is going to be a cripple for life, he is shocked at first; but after he gets over the shock, he usually resigns himself to his fate and then becomes as happy as normal boys.” I felt like taking my hat off to those boys. They taught me a lesson I hope I shall never forget.”

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Tue Apr 23, 2013 11:35 pm
by blossom
centenarian100 wrote:
ljelome wrote:Thank u for ur kind words... as an disabled person the feeling becoming a burden for our caregivers is a very heavily burdening thoughts...Yeah, we should think the opposite, that we can be the source of joy for people around us. A smile, a "thank u", would be very meaningful for our caregivers.

As for the person with this debilitating illness, a comforting partner would be highly needed. Someone who can understand us, our feelings, our emotions, our needs, showing the care not only in the form of words but actions too.
I think that you have a wonderful attitude :-D

I believe that disabled people can live as happy and as full lives as healthy people with the right attitude and the right support.

I feel that we have to seek a balance between trying to advocate for ourselves and improving our situation and trying to make the best out of our situation.

Here is one of my favorite passages from Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People, 1936."

"Abe Lincoln once remarked that ‘most folks are about as happy as they make their minds to be’. He was right. I saw a vivid illustration of that truth as I was walking up the stairs of the Long Island Railroad station in New York. Directly in front of me thirty or forty crippled boys on canes and crutches were struggling up the stairs. One boy had to be carried up. I was astonished at their laughter and gaiety. I spoke about it to one of the men in charge of the boys. “Oh yes,” he said, “when a boy realizes that he is going to be a cripple for life, he is shocked at first; but after he gets over the shock, he usually resigns himself to his fate and then becomes as happy as normal boys.” I felt like taking my hat off to those boys. They taught me a lesson I hope I shall never forget.”
this all sounds great-it is what makes good movies. but, these instances are far and inbetween. i don't want it taken that we shouldn't be kind to our caretakers or that a crippled child can't bring joy or be loved by their parents. or that a couple as annette and her husband would not still love each other and not want to be apart. there are many here at tims and elsewhere that have this in their lives. people that they know each other well enough care enough and know their needs even down to rubbing a cramped foot - or other things that if it was just the hired caregiver you could not expect nor will most do as say make sure your hair is like you want or just have your back rubbed or talk of the before yrs. these have till death they part. but, it still cannot be as good as before as far as what life they previously enjoyed and planned on. and yes, people adapt, they still find things to smile about, enjoy what they still can and it's a choice - they stayed for the long haul because they have integrity, they took to heart what taking a vow meant and they love each other. but, becoming a burden would be hard and watching someone you love go through this would tear me apart. but, they wouldn't not be there for each other. i have a cousin, she's in a wheelchair now can't even feed herself not because of ms. her and ronnie met as young teenagers fell in love married. she got a brain tumor at 18 survived. lost the use of her arm but still went on had 2 daughters lived a pretty good life but time took it's toll and she got worse and worse. 53 yrs. later her and ronnie are still a team he dodes over her they are still in love--much like annette and her husband. but, she and i talk a lot and the longing to be normal and the pain and just tired of being in this situation as much as she loves life and wants to live--she's ready to move on from this torture.

then there are many who don't have anyone to help fill the void of being cheated out of living. yes they have life but are not living. going through the motions "what they can" smileing laughing finding pleasure in whatever they can. what's the choice??? they soon learned that this is a world that when you smile the world smiles with you--cry and you cry alone. you can't display for long how you feel or there would be noone around. or at the least they would make very short visits. so, you develope the skill of survival and doing the best you can. but, deep down you hate it, trying to remember the many blessings you have and there are many--but, what's the choice?

as far as the little boys you speak of i know where you're coming from. yes, they find what happiness they can-they giggle and laugh. they want life as we all do and kids are resiliant. but, i'll never be convinced they are as happy as normal kids. here's true story no. 2--another cousin just turning 13. "wow" i remember when i turned 13-boys, music, danceing, primping in the mirror, the world was my apple! i was gonna do it all-the sky was the limit. now, she on the other hand will never have even these memories. if you saw her face and her big beautiful eyes her perfect creamy complexion and her show stopping smile--you might think that she's a vision of a heavenly angel "which she is". she does great in school, she's very intelligent and hopefully she may go on to be one that we read and hear about and accomplish great things. she has adapted--what's the choice??? she's in her wheelchair because of cerebral palsy from an infant depends on others for most everything. she's always being pushed around by her brothers, they take out in the yard when they play she laughs and joins and chimes in with jokes and chatter. BUT,if you are paying attention to those big beautiful eyes--you see the longing to jump up and grab that ball and take off with it.

so, yes people adapt, kids find their way to what happiness they can. BUT, i will never ever be convinced the kids in this kinda shape or adults that have terrible disabilities have found the happiness of what a healthy child or adult enjoys. again, what's the choice here.

i've caught the "longing look" in my eyes by accident when rideing in the car watching people going about their business things that they're not even paying attention to--i happened to glance at the side view mirror--and there it was the "longing look".

so, no, i don't buy it that anyone "severly disabled" is just as happy as what a healthy sound person or child is. again, just what is the choice???

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 5:52 am
by lyndacarol
VERY well said, blossom!

Re: Annette Funicello passes away :(

Posted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 6:09 am
by KateCW
Beautifully said, Blossom. I have a wonderful husband and son and live a pretty happy, full life. But it's not what it could have been if I had been spared this illness, and I certainly don't consider it a "gift", as people are wont to say about unpleasant, character building experience. I don't waste time being bitter because it's just that-a waste of time. You have to find happiness and nurture it if youncan.