My wife has MS and libido is gone.

A forum to talk about the general challenges of daily life with MS.
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Nov 03, 2015 1:59 am

Re: My wife has MS and libido is gone.

Post by beera » Sat Mar 19, 2016 1:59 pm

I don't have MS, my husband does, but my libido is gone, we used to have sex 2x a week, now it's more like 1-2x/month. I think it does also have to do with just having a kid! DS is exhausting!

Posts: 2
Joined: Fri Feb 10, 2017 8:34 pm

Re: My wife has MS and libido is gone.

Post by Emari » Tue Aug 22, 2017 2:13 pm

This reply may be coming in kind of late, but I just saw your question and would like to respond. What helps me more than anything is relaxing, stopping the world from spinning crazily out of control, breathing and focusing on whatever helps my mind get there. I am not able to function the way I used to, my body will not cooperate. But the mind is a powerful thing and it can produce sensations that are at least acceptable and at best mind blowing. Your wife may be in pain in that area, or she may be embarrassed to discuss the changes. As for your part, a good massage can help. Rub her back, her legs, her feet. Also, not to be graphic, but there are all kinds of toys that can stimulate things even if they inititally seem "dead" to her. Lastly, it requires a total mind, heart, body and soul commitment a lot of adoration, understanding, patience and willingness to create a very intimate bond, not just a physical act. Most men are visual and physical whereas women are thoughtful and sensual. It isn't a matter of cheesy romance, but the combination of deep, deep feelings, emotions, and the demonstration of almost an animalistic pursuit. She's got to feel pretty. She's got to feel desired. She is probably feeling frumpy and broken, and you do have the power to make her feel like a sex goddess. Do that! Don't treat her like a pity case. Treat her like she's the hottest thing you've ever laid eyes on and you'd turn down Heidi Klum just for the chance at one night with your wife. Try that and I wish you the best! For anyone else reading this, guys if your wife is diagnosed with MS and you want your sex life to thrive, you've got to make her feel like she is still hot, sexy, 100% capable and able to turn you into a gasping heap of mush. Treat her like she's that good, and like you cannot believe your luck that she's chosen you. I know it's a stretch for the average male ego, but if you love her and want good sex, you'll find a way to do this. If that doesn't get her at least interested in giving it a go, there's a good chance she's checked out and given into depression, in which case she could probably use some good counseling and a support group. Hope all goes well for all couples struggling with MS and diminished libido!

User avatar
Volunteer Moderator
Posts: 5130
Joined: Sat Nov 20, 2004 3:00 pm
Has thanked: 1 time
Been thanked: 14 times

Re: My wife has MS and libido is gone.

Post by NHE » Wed Aug 23, 2017 12:37 am

The People's Pharmacy recently interviewed Chris Kilham author of "Hot Plants: Nature’s Proven Sex Boosters for Men and Women." He recommends the herb ashwagandha for increasing female libido.

See the following page for more information. ... -sex-life/

You can also download the interview directly from the link below. ... Plants.mp3

Posts: 7
Joined: Thu Jan 17, 2019 4:24 pm

Re: My wife has MS and libido is gone.

Post by Jaxson » Mon Jan 21, 2019 8:19 am

Hi I am 52 years old ms for half of that, haven't been sexually active for 15 yrs. For the sake of our 20 yr marriage my wife has friends that take her out and help keep her life more normal. She does so much, from earning the money completely looks after everything including making it possible for me to stay home with my dog. My angel love her so much :) just thought I'd share our solution from the husbands side.

Posts: 7
Joined: Thu Jan 17, 2019 4:24 pm

Re: My wife has MS and libido is gone.

Post by Jaxson » Tue Mar 12, 2019 11:13 am

I thought Dr.Phil today had a couple on that might help answer some questions about thoughts and feelings that some of us may have :) 12/3

Post Reply
  • Similar Topics
    Last post
  • Posting for my wife, MRI report 'May be MS'
    by nwolfe88 » Fri Mar 02, 2018 6:19 am » in Undiagnosed
    41 Replies
    Last post by NHE
    Tue Mar 13, 2018 12:10 pm