Husband is not supportive whatsoever
Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2015 8:54 am
Okay so I'm new to this site, and haven't ever posted on any kind of forum before but I don't know what else to do.
I'm 27, married with an almost 3 year old son. My husband and I have been on and off since I was 16, so roughly 11 years. We were married in May 2010, I was diagnosed in August of that year. He's in the military and right after we were married he was stationed overseas for two years. I attempted to move out there but was not able to find a neurologist close enough to be seen as often as I need, so I was denied accompanied orders. He was also denied the option of returning to the states because the military didn't find my situation to be "a valid reason" for us to have to be together. Anyway, some back story here, sorry if it's too much information. I debated having children after my diagnosis, but then on a visit home it happened. Our son was born while he was still away and they didn't meet until he was 8 months old, money and time wouldn't allow it any other way
So I worked full time as a supervisor at a local drug store while my husband was still gone, luckily I was living close to my parents at that time and Nana and Papa would watch the little guy while I was working.
My main problem with MS has been extreme fatigue, which luckily is really the only issue I'm having or have had since my diagnosis. So I was working 40+ hours a week with our own house and our son who was between 2-8 months while I worked full time. I struggled daily with balancing work/housework/taking care of an infant. I thank God I had my family to help while my husband was gone. He finished his tour overseas around the end of 2012, and got stationed in NC. We have since moved in to a beautiful house and have been in NC since then. I have tried on multiple occasions to get him to read up on MS, and although he has nothing seems to sink in. He agreed when he came home that I'd stay home and watch our son. We share a vehicle now, and he works 12+ hrs a day 5 days a week. I have always been the one to clean and cook and take care of our son. If the house isn't clean to his expectations every day he is miserable and an absolute pain to be around. He thinks I'm lazy if everything doesn't get done around here every day. I don't know what else I can do to make him aware of how I feel every day. I'm currently on adderral for the fatigue, but have been without a refill for almost 4 days now. Needless to say I'm dragging right now. He thinks I need to get a job to get out of the house, but in the next breath he refuses to clean or cook because he works all day. So all I can think is I'll be extra exhausted having a job and still coming home to a normal day of housework. I'm miserable right now with him not understanding, or even trying to understand how I feel. Can anyone offer any advice here? I'm at my wits end and would welcome any ideas or advice. Thanks
I'm 27, married with an almost 3 year old son. My husband and I have been on and off since I was 16, so roughly 11 years. We were married in May 2010, I was diagnosed in August of that year. He's in the military and right after we were married he was stationed overseas for two years. I attempted to move out there but was not able to find a neurologist close enough to be seen as often as I need, so I was denied accompanied orders. He was also denied the option of returning to the states because the military didn't find my situation to be "a valid reason" for us to have to be together. Anyway, some back story here, sorry if it's too much information. I debated having children after my diagnosis, but then on a visit home it happened. Our son was born while he was still away and they didn't meet until he was 8 months old, money and time wouldn't allow it any other way
So I worked full time as a supervisor at a local drug store while my husband was still gone, luckily I was living close to my parents at that time and Nana and Papa would watch the little guy while I was working.
My main problem with MS has been extreme fatigue, which luckily is really the only issue I'm having or have had since my diagnosis. So I was working 40+ hours a week with our own house and our son who was between 2-8 months while I worked full time. I struggled daily with balancing work/housework/taking care of an infant. I thank God I had my family to help while my husband was gone. He finished his tour overseas around the end of 2012, and got stationed in NC. We have since moved in to a beautiful house and have been in NC since then. I have tried on multiple occasions to get him to read up on MS, and although he has nothing seems to sink in. He agreed when he came home that I'd stay home and watch our son. We share a vehicle now, and he works 12+ hrs a day 5 days a week. I have always been the one to clean and cook and take care of our son. If the house isn't clean to his expectations every day he is miserable and an absolute pain to be around. He thinks I'm lazy if everything doesn't get done around here every day. I don't know what else I can do to make him aware of how I feel every day. I'm currently on adderral for the fatigue, but have been without a refill for almost 4 days now. Needless to say I'm dragging right now. He thinks I need to get a job to get out of the house, but in the next breath he refuses to clean or cook because he works all day. So all I can think is I'll be extra exhausted having a job and still coming home to a normal day of housework. I'm miserable right now with him not understanding, or even trying to understand how I feel. Can anyone offer any advice here? I'm at my wits end and would welcome any ideas or advice. Thanks