I really can't think of a title for this post.

A forum to talk about the general challenges of daily life with MS.

I really can't think of a title for this post.

Postby GeoGuy » Thu Dec 11, 2008 10:55 pm

I haven't been posting much lately because I have had non-MS related issues to deal with in life. All of you here have been so supportive and helpful since I was diagnosed, I feel like you guys are my on-line family, so I want to share what's been going on.

A few days before Halloween, my longtime (almost 23 years) live-in girlfriend, Di Ann, ended her life with a gun. I was present when she did it. Life has been really weird since. My MS has been behaving, although I have experenced a lot more fatigue than normal.

MS has never been scarier. Even though I have friends that would help if I needed, being alone and facing the uncertianties that come with MS is daunting to say the least. What if I have another exacerbation that leaves me unable to walk and see? I don't expect answers, I just needed to share. Thanks for listening, reading I guess.

RRMS since 01/07.
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Postby Loobie » Fri Dec 12, 2008 5:56 am

Hey Jack,

I don't know what to say specific to what happened. That had to have just ripped your heart out of your chest. You seem to be somebody (of course I don't know you but through your posts) that has a lot of "positive stuff' inside you. So I think that after you grieve and do what you have to do, your outgoingness and zeal for life will make sure that you never have to do much in a vacuum. You just seem like someone who likes to give of themselves, and thusly people probably gravitate your way as a matter of course. That's a good thing.

I'm terribly sorry for your loss and hope that you can truly find some piece of mind at some point after such a devastating event. You're in my prayers.
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Postby cheerleader » Fri Dec 12, 2008 8:00 am

Jack...I am so sorry. Beyond sorry. You are a man that has shown us such a love and zeal for life. The beautiful photography you've shared with us has shown us how much you treasure life, and all of its gifts. I can't imagine what it has been like to watch someone you love turn against life so violently, and with such finality.

Keep plugged into life, the things that bring you joy. Find support from all the people who love you. Know that we can never make anyone else happy, we can only share our lives with them for as long as they want us around. Take care of yourself, nourish your heart, return to the things that give you peace. You are in my prayers-
Husband dx RRMS 3/07
dx dual jugular vein stenosis (CCSVI) 4/09
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Postby dignan » Fri Dec 12, 2008 9:07 am

I'm so sorry to hear that. I can't even imagine the emotional roller-coster you must have been on for the last few weeks. Not that there is anything good about this situation, but I'm glad to hear you're MS hasn't been causing problems.
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Postby carolew » Fri Dec 12, 2008 2:04 pm

That is horrible Geoguy. Do take care of you so the MS won't spring forward. Wish I could roll back time and correct things with just liquid paper.... keep in touch.. Carole
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Postby Lyon » Fri Dec 12, 2008 2:55 pm

Last edited by Lyon on Sun Nov 27, 2011 12:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Artifishual » Fri Dec 12, 2008 4:00 pm

So sorry Jack. Best wishes
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Postby catfreak » Fri Dec 12, 2008 8:28 pm


You and Cheer were the first 2 people to welcome me to this website. You shared your story about MS and about Rebif with me and made me feel a part of and involved in a community of caring and compassionate people much like myself.

My heart is breaking for you. I am so sorry. Like the other have said you are someone full of life and love. Hang in there.

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Postby Terry » Sun Dec 14, 2008 8:21 pm

Hey Jack,
I'm thinking of you. Please post often. We'll want to know that you are doing okay.
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Postby GeoGuy » Wed Dec 17, 2008 6:25 pm

Thanks to each of you for your expression of sympathy and concern. It truly makes me feel good to know you each are out there.

I've had a lot of support and help from my family, co-workers, and friends, including you guys. I have been seeing a counseler and going to a suicide support group, both of which have been a tremendous help. Talking about what happened is cathartic. Talking about problems doesn't make them go away , but it can help make the easier to deal with, kind of like how we all use this site to help deal with our or our loved ones MS.

Thanks again.

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Loss of a loved one

Postby she-aardvark » Sun Feb 01, 2009 11:31 am

Somebody gave me this when I dad died and i helped. I hope you find the same.

Death is nothing at all
I have only slipped away into the next room

I am I and you are you

Whatever we were to each other

That we are still

Call me by my old familiar name

Speak to me in the easy way you always used

Put no difference into your tone

Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow

Laugh as we always laughed

At the little jokes we always enjoyed together

Play, smile, think of me, pray for me

Let my name be ever the household word that it always was

Let it be spoken without effort

Without the ghost of a shadow in it

Life means all that it ever meant

It is the same as it ever was

There is absolute unbroken continuity

What is death but a negligible accident?

Why should I be out of mind

Because I am out of sight?

I am waiting for you for an interval

Somewhere very near

Just around the corner

All is well.

Nothing is past; nothing is lost

One brief moment and all will be as it was before

How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!

Canon Henry Scott-Holland, 1847-1918, Canon of St Paul's Cathedral
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Postby Punchy » Fri Feb 06, 2009 2:35 pm

I've only just seen this post, and I hate to bring up a painful subject for you again on the boards, but you've been a great support to me on here as well - we haven't chatted a lot so you probably don't even realize how much.

This past year I lost someone I loved dearly to suicide, and I was unable to go to their funeral, visit with family or get proper closure because of a horrid MS relapse that kept me housebound. I thought I resented this damn disease before, but that took it to a whole new level.

I truly wish all the best for you.
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