Your situation brought back memories for me as well. I got my diagnosis 4 yrs ago just a couple days before xmas.
**cue:the sweet sound of violins**
I recall I could not work, and so money was tight--however, I was determined to buy gifts for my three young sons. So, I secretly scavenged around my house, seeking every bit of loose change I could find, put it in a huge ziploc bag, and drove to my bank to cash it out. I somehow lugged myself, gimpy left leg and all inside and parked myself at window number one, exhausted. Chris, I'm sure you understand this type of tiredness. I found myself face to face with what seemed to be the female version of Eb Scrooge, complete with wizened scowl! [this really happened] I shuddered.
Anyhow, my account was overdrawn, so she would not cash out the coinage. This is for my kids, I thought to myself...so I begged her to reconsider, but....
I turned, and limped back out toward my car, dragging my now spent leg behind me. As soon as I stepped outside the most beautifully ironic thing happened. It began to snow these big fluffy flakes! The pretty scene arrested my defeated spirit, and I drove straight to Toys 'R Us where a friendly clerk was more than happy to accept all the coins, without making me feel embarassed.
My sons had gifts to open, and I was pleased with myself. I had never known that I could be so brave and strong!
No doubt, you have discovered the same. Often, it seems the dx is worse than the disease itself. Take heart, my friend, and know that you have found, IMO, the most intelligent and upbeat ms website possible!
We are all in this together.