I am new here and do not have MS but was dating someone with Primary Progressive for 9 months.
We had known each other as friends and then I got back in touch with him after he had gone overseas but came back. We had always got on really well, and had met a few times but as friends.
He got me through a very stressful divorce and was my rock last year. We started dating and got on SO WELL. I told him he had been the best person I had dated only to be met with, "That does not say much for the people you have dated", which I though very sad as he would not take a compliment. This happened several times and he continually belittled himself and said such things as , "If you felt better about yourself you would not be dating me" which I also found very sad.
He kept saying we should break up as although we got on really well, sex was always an issue because of his physical constraints. I told him I was happy to explore other means but he said he was concerned it would be an even bigger issue in the future.
In March he told me he wanted some space (always a bad sign in my opinion). I left it two weeks and then asked if I could ring him. I asked, if I had not made the move to contact him, would I have heard from him ever again? He said, no.
He started taking Fampyra and last year we went on a short break and he did so much walking. He is still taking it but never leaves the house other than to throw out the rubbish, or go for a meal once a month with his mother which is door to door service in her car. I asked him if he was getting out and he said no and complained his feet had swollen up from lack of mobility.
It has been two months since we broke up and I miss him terribly. I told him and he told me that me telling him how I felt made him feel "awkward".
I cannot believe someone can change their feelings so quickly, and do know his MS is playing a part in this. He has no friends, no social contact other than his nurse/dr and mother. He spends all day sat in front of his PC, smoking.
I know he is capable of so much more, but chooses not to go out or mix with people. I told him to join an online forum or go to his local group and was met with a cutting response.
He used to be such a great looking guy but doesn't bother with his appearance and has aged rapidly (he is 46). He told me that he had no ambitions in life now at 46. I found that quite revealing.
I told him I would be happy to take him out and go on holiday but am met with no, no , no to everything.
He is very close to his mother and let slip that once she had passed away, he would end his life as would have nothing left to live for. He is not the sort of person to make such remarks.
So, I am really at a loss as to what to do. We are talking now, and I want to see him (he lives 2.5 hours away from me), but I don't want him to tell me to get lost for good.
Any advice would be appreciated.
Thanks for reading.