I want to know what I did so wrong in life to deserve this. I honestly don’t see the point in anything since it will all end in the same place with me unable to work and being fully or partly blind and needing some type of assistance to walk.I just want to feel normal again and stop crying but I don’t see how. I know my dream of this being something else if just that a dream… but it at least allowed me to feel hope for what is probably the last time in my life.
Sorry for the depressing rambling I am just realizing more and more that I will never have the life I want with this. I get angry at the "normal" people for just talking about their normal life. I just wish I could win the lottery so I could be left alone in my apartment.
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Sometimes things just happen, don't blame yourself. In any case, blaming yourself will not accomplish anything.
I honestly don’t see the point in anything since it will all end in the same place with me unable to work and being fully or partly blind and needing some type of assistance to walk.
There is more to life than working, but please keep in mind that most people with MS can work and out of necessity will choose to work at something they enjoy (while most people work at jobs they hate). ALSO, most with MS don't go blind, don't need assistance to walk, don't loose their mobility and can and do lead happy, relatively healthy, productive lives.
Learn to turn lemons into lemonade!
I can think of quite a few different types of pain. Can you explain what the pain you feel is like and whereabouts it feels worst?
The clearer the description the easier it is to make a suggestion. I note you're on a few things already. Not all medications help pain, some just mask it or make you perceive it differently.
Well, that's not actually pain. I think you have to talk to someone to resolve that. You're obviously very despondent and, of course, your heart can ache.
Don't talk yourself into something or it just might come to pass. There are plenty of us who are living productive lives despite a diagnosis. I've had three children and raised them, held down a job, overcome a lot of spasticity issues and am looking forward to the rest of my days. I have never thought the way you do because no one was ever going to sympathize with me and I knew that as long as I could move about that the game wasn't over.
Prepare yourself for what might never happen. Don't plan for something to happen because I guarantee it will.
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